Samantha Brick, I Am A Troll Next To You.

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While Samantha Brick celebrates her good looks, I am celebrating the joys of being average.

Surely you must have heard about Big Brother star Samantha Brick's famed article entitled: ‘Why women hate me for being beautiful’ In April this year the 41 year old spun wonderful tales to Daily Mail readers of a stream of over-enamored men buying her bottles of champagne and bunches of flowers merely because of her looks.

In the article, she controversially wrote -  I’m tall, slim, blonde and so I’m often told, a good-looking woman’

I’ll let you decide if Brick is deluding herself as to whether she has a face like a Goddess or a melted welly, but I must ask the question; what on earth does that mean for all us short, squat, mousey women? Are we to be outcast? Sent away to be bleached, nipped and tucked until we reach what society deems to be beautiful?

Confessions of the averagely rated

I am the first to admit that I am what is known as a distinctly average looking person. I have mousy brown hair, a normal figure and a not too ugly, but equally not too beautiful, face and I’m happy with that. It is a rare occurrence that a bloke will squint past the gorgeous, blonde bombshells I Iike to call friends and notice me sat in a corner giggling at my own dodgy jokes. The fact is, is that I am the anti-Brick.

In our favourite women’s magazines like Cosmopolitan, More! and Glamour, they seem to be campaigning hard for the message, ‘you can get what you want in life if you have the right shade of  lipstick and  a fashionable haircut.’  But I would much rather someone bought me a drink because my egg puns cracked them up, or they appreciated my ability to do the Soulja Boy dance, rather than the influence of a low cut dress. But the fact is, is that humour, free-spiritedness and kindness are generally considered second-rate traits in a beauty obsessed world.

On a typical night out for example when nothing except the words ‘DOWN IT’ can be heard above the speakers and general hubbub of students screaming about how much they love that Nicki Minaj song,  you are relying completely on your looks to give a first impression. So if, like me, you  inevitably end up dancing like a maniac whenever ‘Call Me Maybe’ comes on with a face full of  makeup that looks like it’s been inspired by the Grudge, this does not bode well.

But surely it is personality that should be worshipped not looks?

Recently, someone figured out that an average woman spends about 43 weeks of their life applying makeup. This person obviously had a lot of make-up free time on their hands so they were probably either male or a hermit. Or both.

So that is nearly a whole year of your life spent covering up blemishes that probably aren’t that noticeable and avoiding wrinkles that WILL come anyway. In that time you could have learned how to rock climb, finished a third of your degree or watched every single episode of Friends. Again. Surely any of these are a better use of your time than spending hours primping and preening for……what? Who are you trying to impress?

I’m not gonna to lie to you, I’m still going to slap on a bit of make up and continue the ongoing  struggle to tame my hair into something that doesn’t look like a style Worzel Gummage was sporting last Fashion Week. But unlike Samantha Brick, I realise that I have more valuable things going for me than a designer wardrobe and insanely white teeth. Instead some of us have a sense of humour, ambition and confidence in ourselves to carry us through life, something far more valuable than a set of blonde hair extensions.

To reel in horror at Samantha Brick’s article, take a look at this link:

Philippa Barnes

Aspiring journalist for BounceSin, currently stumbling through life in Leeds. Likes reading, dancing and sangria - but not the hangover.

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