We’ve all been there; your friends or perhaps your date are running late and you’re sat all alone warming up a bar stool like a prize idiot. The eyes of the room are slowly beginning to pan your way and the crowds are all muttering things like, ‘I wonder if he’s been stood up,’ or, ‘Do you think he’s a serial killer?’ Like I said, we’ve all been there.
In this situation there will always be the odd few that will glare at you with a mixture of pity and awkward embarrassment but there are some things we can do in the way of a salvage mission to keep dignity our intact.
Avoid clock watching
Do not look at your watch, do not break out your phone every two seconds to check the time, do not stare at the wall clock and certainly do not ask the bar staff for the time. If you’re clock watching you are not comfortable and you are just drawing attention to the fact that you’re alone and potentially stood up. Just don’t do it.
Do not text
Or rather don’t pretend to text. People that are waiting alone in a bar always seem to instantly grab for their phones where they will invariably either re-read old messages just in case they missed some key detail or desperately begin scrabbling through their phone numbers to find someone that they can message. It’s obvious that you’re struggling. If you must get your phone out, then make an actual phone call. At least that way it’s obvious that you have at least one friend. Unless you called your Mum, in which case you’ve failed.
Don’t get too drunk
Drink responsibly because in the event that your pals do eventually arrive you don’t want to be the drunk fool in the corner. That’s never a good look. On the flip-side of things, if they don’t arrive you definitely don’t want to be the lonely drunk fool in the corner. Also, never a good look.
If the place is quiet, talk to the bar staff
You’re alone and the chances are that they are as bored as hell and also counting down the hours until they can get out of there. It makes sense for you to talk to them. In general they will probably welcome it and take it as a spot of light relief. The advantages of this are that you don’t look so socially inept anymore and that you may also make a new friend. A new friend with access to the drinks fridge, which is always good for dodging those queues later on.
Failing that just follow the lead of our old Lynx man…
-The Lynx Effect Team